The latest occurred as I was sauntering down the streets of downtown Milwaukee as I made my way into work the other morning. Actually, let’s be honest – it’s late October in Wisconsin. No one saunters anymore. It’s a rapid walk to/from anywhere in hopes your digits don’t turn into purple icicles in 2.2 seconds.
To give a little background on this incident (and Eric will most definitely agree), I usually make terrible decisions when it comes to sensible footwear in the fall/winter months. I’m the girl that wears open-toe shoes throughout October until I can’t stand the numbing and purple tint my tootsies get. I’m also the girl that you see roaming around in 15 inches of snow with four inch heels on. Like I said, awful decisions. And I know I should be more sensible, but I’m not, which probably entitles me to a few of the ridiculous events that transpire.
Anyway, I was rounding the corner at a major intersection and was about to open the office building door. All was looking hunky dory. Suddenly, before I know it, I’m walking…left foot, right foot, left foot…and I go to step with my right heeled foot and my heel cements itself into a HUGE crack in the pavement! And my momentum was going with such force that I continued to take another two steps forward…WITHOUT MY RIGHT SHOE before I could stop. Eeks!
And because I also put off wearing socks for as long as I can, poor “righty” landed smack dab on the cold, dirty pavement…all NAKED! Here's the closest visual I could find. This chick looks like she's on some sort of grate, which I was not, but you get the idea:
Oh, and not only was I now sans one shoe in the middle of downtown, the heel on my pump got so wedged into the f’ing crack that I had to use both hands to pull the sucker out! For a brief millisecond, I panicked thinking about what my plan would be if I couldn’t get the shoe out of the crack.
Possibly run home and hide under the covers in my bed?
Luckily, it came out of the crack a second later…minus the leather the stupid asphalt tore off the heel. Guess I didn’t really want that leather piece anyway. Looks like the black Sharpie will need to fix this boo-boo…
To make matters worse, this all went down right in front of glass doors which are next to a bank of elevators that typically hold court to 10-15 people at any given time around the 8 o’clock hour. Well, I must’ve been REALLY good the previous day (or maybe scaled back on my road rage that morning) to be granted a “freebie”. Only one older woman was there. Phew. And she was nice about it, too…even going so far as to say it’s happened to her before. Who knows if it really happened to her, but at least my blushed cheeks started to fade. I’m sure they’ll make another appearance all too soon, though.
~as
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